freedom
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I am not the rare butterfly, the lone flame burning bright in a sea of shadows. I am not the chosen one, not the anomaly, not the girl with the golden key to the kingdom of suffering. The truth, stark and bitter as the taste of raw earth, is that I am ordinary in my…
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In the turbulent waters of my heroin addiction, I was a sailor lost, my vessel breaking against the jagged shores of despair. Every needle was a desperate row, an attempt to steer away from the wreckage I was becoming. My oars, stained with the shadows of self-destruction, fought against the currents that whispered of a…
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Mine is a story woven with threads of detestation, betrayal, haunting memories, and a soul that was nearly destroyed. But it is also a story of redemption, learning to trust again, hope, and feeling truly alive. For years, I lived with a sense of hatred towards myself and my body. The abuse I suffered at…
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I see so much misguided fear around abuse of children. Talk of sex trafficking, kidnapping and abductions by strangers run rampant on the news, on the internet & in family circles. These views show me that we haven’t learned much as a society about the realities of childhood sexual abuse. At all. Yes, these things…
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Here’s to all of you out there committed to healing and dedicated to growth, embracing the daily courage required to shift from self-betrayal to self-acceptance and self-love. Healing is a profound journey, not for the faint-hearted. It demands facing our deepest wounds and vulnerabilities, often unearthed through years of self-protection and denial. It is a…
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“My bathroom had now become the bathroom in the old motel room in ’68. My mind’s eye flew open. The window of the memory had started with that body memory. I didn’t realize what my hand was telling me until I was instantly back in the motel room. Plain as day, I was there, again.…
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On the discussion of fear, do you see God sitting in heaven holding a big stick ready to punish you? Mercy and grace can be differentiated as follows: mercy is the act of withholding deserved punishment, while grace is the act of endowing unmerited favor. In His mercy, God does not give us the punishment…
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Both of my parents exercised their power in cruel and unloving ways. As a little girl I did my very best to do what pleased them. I kept a smile on my face when we were around people. I invested large amounts of my time denying who they were. At all costs to myself, I…
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I cried out to God and He heard me, He soothed my pain and delivered me. I cried out to God and He helped me, My anguish subsided and I could see. I cried out to God and He heard me.
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I can have anger and not hate. I can love and not forgive. I can forgive and leave. The older I get the more I realize that life is about balance. Coming thru such severe childhood trauma I often get stuck in an off-balance kind of place — everything is good or everything is bad.…