Johnny Cash made the song famous. The chorus:
On a Sunday mornin' sidewalk
I'm wishin', Lord, that I was stoned
'Cause there's somethin' in a Sunday
That makes a body feel alone
And there's nothin' short a' dyin'
That's half as lonesome as the sound
Of the sleepin' city sidewalk
And Sunday mornin' comin' down
I don’t wish I was stoned but watching church service sometimes leaves me feeling down. Most services start with, “I’ve been married 30 years, my children are perfect and I’ve served the Lord pretty good for 40 years.”
Wow! I can’t compete. And actually I won’t.
The life I wish I had was taken from me – not once, but twice. My childhood was a bleak existence of making it through. Then, I married at 18. That family was also taken from me through deep abuse to me and my children.
So, I don’t get to stand anywhere and say proudly, “I’ve been married 44 years.” To say that would have cost me and my children more. I probably would have lost my oldest daugther to heroin and my youngest may have stayed close to her abusive father. I don’t know because I didn’t stay. I am so thankful for that.
One day I wish a church service would open that says, “I am here by the grace of God not because I did everything right. What tried to take me out in life did not and I am so grateful for that. I’ve struggled with addiction, I’ve been married four times but I love God with all my heart and soul. What he has saved me from is nothing less than a miracle. That’s why I stand here today – because of His goodness, His grace – His mercy.
One this day I just wanted to write to those of us that love God with all of our heart but our stories were modified by choices we didn’t make and some choices we did make.
I want to remember you today. God sees each of us. He doesn’t disqualify us if we have been through divorce, struggled with alcohol, shopping or drugs. Nothing disqualified us for His love. He uses those of us with lives given over and it’s never too late.
Take heart! God sees us all. Each story has purpose. You are not disqualified because you haven’t lived “just right!” As a matter of fact, I think it is those of us with the most interesting story to tell.
If God did it for me, He can and will do it for you!
Stay loved today.
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