happiness
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It seems a lot of the struggle in the Christian life comes down to one question: who is actually carrying the weight of change? A lot of people are trying to change themselves for God instead of letting God change them. Self-reliance says: I will fix myself. I will control myself. I will make myself…
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For the next 12 days, we are returning to posts from the past that have been the most popular with YOU! Here’s our 5th post as a nod to our readers. Am I a Murderer When I was three and a half years old, I murdered a woman. I spent the next 50 years retracing…
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Several of the women recalled lying awake, motionless, waiting for the inevitable – a brother or father coming in to molest them. The Body Keeps the Score, van der Kolk, Chapter 2, Trauma Before Dawn These were my nights. Many of them. And, I survived. How I survived is the thing to be questioned. As…
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Introspection — what better way to start a week. Question: What would life feel like uninhibited by pain? Brigadoon is a place that is idyllic, unaffected by time, or remote from reality. My Brigadoon is living a life hidden with God. I am tucked away in his kingdom – forever safe. I am not remote from reality but…
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Introspection — what better way to start a week. Question: Do you fear being alone? Abusive relationships in our childhood teach us that we have no personal space, no time to be alone that isn’t overseen by the abuser, and nothing that would make us believe we were an individual. Individual means single or separate.…
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Introspection — what better way to start a week. Question: Do you easily call out the deception in your abuser(s) or do you deny what you see? One of the easiest ways to stay outside of healing and freedom is to deny what you see. As children, if you came through childhood sexual crimes, you…
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Introspection — what better way to start a week. Question: Does my past abuse, and the actions of survival and sin I’ve done since, make me too bad for a relationship with God? Children have a hard time making a distinction between themselves and thier parents. God does not. The actions and sins of another…
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Happiness. What a strange, fleeting bird. You chase it with hands still dirty from the past, grasping, wanting, and yet it slips through, laughing in a language you’ve long forgotten. But I tell you, there’s a way to catch it, even when your pockets are filled with stones from your childhood, even when the ghosts…
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Introspection — what better way to start a week. Question: Don’t we all want to be a good son or daugther? What happens when that means I need to be disobedient to my parents’ rules to survive? What if my speaking up goes against everything they taught me? What if my needs now must surface…
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Where is home? What is home? The more I heal, the more I seem to feel displaced. When I lived in the streams of denial, life seemed more pleasant – I think. At least I could pretend. Not pretending can make me feel like a fish out of the ocean. It’s like I was issued…